Illustration of "soaking" or the act of vaginal penetration without subsequent thrusting

Soaking, also known as marinating or floating, is a sexual practice of inserting the penis into the vagina but not subsequently thrusting, reportedly used by some members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (LDS Church).[1][2][3] News sources do not report it being a common practice, and some Latter-day Saints have said that soaking is an urban legend and not an actual practice.[1][4] Others report knowing church members who had soaked.[1][5][6][7]

One source stated it was difficult to know how common it was due to the secrecy and shame around sex in the LDS Church,[2] and underreporting due to the social-desirability bias is a common issue even among anonymous surveys of many stigmatized sexual behaviors.[8][9] Articles state it is usually Latter-day Saint teenagers and unmarried students at church-sponsored universities who participate in the practice. They also state students are concerned that confessing to or getting caught having pre- or extra-marital sex is against those universities' codes of conduct and can get them expelled.[3][10][6] An interviewee stated that star basketball player Brandon Davies was expelled from the basketball team of the LDS Church's largest university Brigham Young University (BYU) for soaking.[3][11]

Soaking serves as a purported loophole to the LDS Church's sexual code of conduct, called the law of chastity, which states that all sex outside of a heterosexual marriage is a sin,[2][12][13] and further bars masturbation for church members.[14][15][16] While it purportedly circumvents the church's restrictions, top leaders have stated that "it is wrong to touch the private ... parts of another person’s body even if clothed" outside of a monogamous heterosexual marriage.[17][18]

Historical citing of a chastity loophole

In 1885, one of the LDS Church's top leaders, 73-year-old apostle Albert Carrington, argued during excommunication proceedings that his decade of extramarital sexual relationships with multiple younger women did not count as adultery and was only a "little folly" because he would only partially penetrate the vagina with just the tip of his penis and part of the shaft (reportedly to less than the total "depth of four inches"), and pulled out before ejaculation.[19]

In 2021, a video about soaking went viral on TikTok,[20][6][5] and the practice has its own page on the pop-culture website "Know Your Meme".[21] It has been used as a plot point in sitcoms in the early 2020s,[2][22] such as the television series Alpha House,[22] Get Shorty,[23][24] and Jury Duty.[25][26] It was also referenced in the book Up Up, Down Down,[27] in a Barstool Sports video segment,[28] and in at least one short film of Mormon pornography.[29]

Reactions

Two satirical social media accounts, the BYU Virginity Club[30] and the BYU Slut Club,[31] have both disavowed the practice.[32][33] One author noted that soaking does not prevent the spread of sexually transmitted infection and may still result in pregnancy.[3]

Practices described in the following sources as related to soaking include jump humping, provo pushing, and durfing:

  • Jump humping – Soaking is sometimes accompanied by "jump humping", in which a third person is invited to bounce on the bed (or to push up on the mattress from below) for a couple engaged in soaking, thus generating motion for them (according to TikTokers ExmoLex and FuneralPotatoSlut, and a BYU student interviewee on Barstool Sports).[12][20][13] The external source of motion allegedly absolves the soaking couple from responsibility for any genital movement.[1][2][34]
  • Provo pushing – The "jump hump" assistant has been termed the "bed jumper" or "Provo pusher" (after Provo, Utah, home of BYU).[1] Other definitions of "provo push" refer to it as clothed or unclothed, non-penetrative dry humping or sexual frottage between church members,[35][36]
  • Durfing – Dry humping between church members is also called "durfing".[10]

See also

References

  1. 1 2 3 4 5 Ball, Siobhan (September 29, 2021). "Soaking, the sin-free Mormon sex trend, has made its way to TikTok". The Daily Dot. Retrieved October 10, 2021.
  2. 1 2 3 4 5 Salmin, Dee (October 6, 2021). "What is 'Soaking' – the Mormon sex practise that's gone viral on TikTok?". Triple J. Australian Broadcasting Company. Retrieved October 10, 2021.
  3. 1 2 3 4 Lindsay, Jessica (October 9, 2021). "Jump humping and soaking: How Mormon teens are getting around their religion's premarital sex rules". Metro. Retrieved June 3, 2023.
  4. ↑ "Is 'Soaking' a Real Mormon Sex Thing?". Slate. September 29, 2021.
  5. 1 2 Templeton, Sarah (January 10, 2021). "What is 'soaking' and 'jump-humping'?: The Mormon sex acts going viral on social media". Newshub. Warner Bros. Discovery New Zealand.
  6. 1 2 3 Lewak, Doree (September 30, 2021). "Mormon sex act that's gone viral". New York Post. Retrieved October 10, 2021 – via News.com.au.
  7. ↑ Smith, C. Brian (July 18, 2017). "Soaking, Derfing and the 'Mormon Soak': Sex Without Losing Virginity?". MEL Magazine. Retrieved May 5, 2023.
  8. ↑ King, Bruce M. (April 1, 2022). "The Influence of Social Desirability on Sexual Behavior Surveys: A Review". Archives of Sexual Behavior. Springer Science. 51 (3): 1495–1501. doi:10.1007/s10508-021-02197-0. ISSN 1573-2800. PMC 8917098. PMID 35142972 – via ResearchGate.net. However, indirect evidence indicates that under-reporting (e.g., of a number of sexual partners, receptive anal intercourse, condom use) is common. Among the general population, several studies have now reported that even with anonymous responding, there are significant correlations between a variety of self-reported sexual behaviors (e.g., use of condoms, sexual fantasies, exposure to pornography, penis size) and social desirability, with evidence that extreme under- or over-reporting is as common as is found in other fields.
  9. ↑ Ueffing, Philipp; Dasgupta, Aisha N. Z.; Kantorová, Vladimíra (November 2020). "Sexual activity by marital status and age: a comparative perspective" (PDF). Journal of Biosocial Science. Cambridge University Press. 52 (6): 4, 18. doi:10.1017/S002193201900083X. ISSN 0021-9320. PMID 31847925. S2CID 209409020 – via United Nations.
  10. 1 2 Williams, Kori (September 30, 2021). "We Almost Wish We Didn't Know What 'Mormon Soaking' Is". Distractify. Retrieved April 25, 2023.
  11. ↑ Branch, John (March 12, 2011). "Kept Off Court, but Welcomed by B.Y.U. Fans and Teammates". The New York Times.
  12. 1 2 López, Canela (September 28, 2021). "Mormon teens on TikTok are filming themselves 'jump-humping', a tactic used to avoid thrusting during penetrative sex". Insider. Retrieved March 3, 2022.
  13. 1 2 Marks, Andrea (October 26, 2022). "A Rumor About a Crabs Outbreak at Brigham Young University Sparks Talk of Armpit Sex". Rolling Stone. Retrieved April 24, 2023.
  14. ↑ Malan, Mark Kim; Bullough, Vern (December 2005). "Historical development of new masturbation attitudes in Mormon culture: Silence, secular conformity, counterrevolution, and emerging reform". Sexuality & Culture. 9 (4): 94–109. CiteSeerX 10.1.1.597.8039. doi:10.1007/s12119-005-1003-z. S2CID 145480822 – via Internet Archive.
  15. ↑ "Chapter 3: Missionary Conduct". Missionary Standards for Disciple of Jesus Christ. LDS Church. November 2019. Archived from the original on November 21, 2019 – via Internet Archive. You should avoid any thought or action that would separate you from the Spirit of God. This includes but is not limited to adultery; fornication; same-sex activity; oral sex; arousing sexual feelings; inappropriate touching; sending or receiving messages, images, or videos that are immoral or sexual in nature; masturbation; and viewing or using pornography.
  16. ↑ Stephenson, Kathy (April 16, 2021). "Latter-day Saint sex therapist plans to fight to keep her church membership". Salt Lake Tribune. Archived from the original on April 3, 2023. Retrieved April 3, 2023 – via Internet Archive. Church spokesman Eric Hawkins said in a statement that ... the church condemns pornography in any form and sees masturbation as immoral.
  17. ↑ Fletcher Stack, Peggy (October 1, 2022). "A look at the new language in the LDS Church's 'For the Strength of Youth' guide". Salt Lake Tribune. Retrieved June 3, 2023.
  18. ↑ For the Strength of Youth: A Guide for Making Choices. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. May 21, 2022. Retrieved June 1, 2023.
  19. ↑ Bergera, Gary James (July 1, 2011). "Transgression in the LDS Community: The Cases of Albert Carrington, Richard R. Lyman, and Joseph F. Smith: Part 1". Journal of Mormon History. University of Illinois Press. 37 (3): 147. doi:10.2307/23292726. ISSN 0094-7342. JSTOR 23292726. S2CID 254480353 – via Utah State University.
  20. 1 2 Jackson, Gita (September 27, 2021). "Viral 'Jump Humping' TikTok Teaches the World About Mormon Sex". Vice. Retrieved October 10, 2021.
  21. ↑ "Mormon Soaking/Jump Humping". Know Your Meme. September 27, 2021.
  22. 1 2 Weber, Brenda R. (2019). Latter-day Screens: Gender, Sexuality, and Mediated Mormonism. Duke University Press. p. 206. ISBN 978-1-4780-0529-2.
  23. ↑ Palmieri, Lea (April 9, 2020). "Steamy & Streamy: The 'Get Shorty' TV Show Taught Us About a Kinky Sex Craze Called 'Soaking'". Decider.
  24. ↑ Rausch, Andrew J. (May 6, 2022). Perspectives on Elmore Leonard: Conversations with Authors, Experts and Collaborators. McFarland & Company. p. 84. ISBN 978-1-4766-8002-6 – via Google Books.
  25. ↑ Bell, BreAnna (April 26, 2023). "Why 'Jury Duty' Boss Cody Heller Almost Cut That Soaking Scene, Pitches Season 2 Set in a 'Whole Different Universe'". Variety.
  26. ↑ "Ineffective Assistance". Jury Duty. Season 1. Episode 5. April 13, 2023. Event occurs at 26:30. Amazon Freevee. Retrieved April 14, 2023.
  27. ↑ Knapp, Cheston (February 6, 2018). Up Up, Down Down. Simon & Schuster. p. 117. ISBN 978-1-5011-6104-9 – via Google Books.
  28. ↑ Paolantonio, Rone Angelo (November 18, 2019). "The Secret World Of Sex In Utah". Barstool Sports.
  29. ↑ Soaking. PureTaboo. May 31, 2022. Retrieved June 3, 2023.
  30. ↑ Malone Kircher, Madeline (July 21, 2021). "Is the Brigham Young University Virginity Club for Real? An Investigation". Slate.
  31. ↑ Leibert, Emily (November 3, 2021). "The BYU Slut Club Wants Everyone to Live Their Best Slutty Life". InsideHook.
  32. ↑ Crimmins, Tricia (October 28, 2021). "'Why are companies allowed to control what u do?': Boss threatens to fire TikToker who explained 'soaking' Mormon sex trend in viral video". Daily Dot. Retrieved June 3, 2023.
  33. ↑ Moore, Andria (October 20, 2021). "'Soaking' Has Become A Viral Conversation Because It's Apparently How Mormons Avoid Penetrative Sex Before Marriage". BuzzFeed. Retrieved June 3, 2023.
  34. ↑ Malashevich, Valerija (December 7, 2022). "Sex or scripture: The Madonnna-Whore complex". Michigan Daily. Ann Arbor, Michigan: University of Michigan. Retrieved April 25, 2023.
  35. ↑ Curry, Colleen (February 6, 2013). "Jodi Arias Said Travis Alexander Had 'Bill Clinton' View of Sex". ABC News. Retrieved February 28, 2023.
  36. ↑ "More Sexual Details in Jodi Arias Testimony". CNN. February 7, 2013. Retrieved February 28, 2023.
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